Category Archives: Family matters

Life will never be the same again

It is in this stillness of the night that my mind refuses to rest, and keeps whirring at a multitude of thoughts..

I think of how I think of dad everyday

How each time my he comes into my mind tears well up in my eyes

How the moment comes without warning, hitting my heart with a profound sadness and yearning for him.

Only 28 years of my life I had a dad. Out of that 6 years was spent away from home.

Moments like this I surrender my heart and soul to the pain I don’t know how to relieve.

I will always be missing you dad. I just can’t bring myself to say it aloud most of the time, I’m trying too hard to stop the tears from falling ;(

I celebrated my first birthday without my dad. I truly miss the moment of receiving my first birthday greeting every year on the card he will slip under my door, with a text to wish me. My dad was always the first person to write me my card. And sadly this year, the first year that he was gone.. There was no card for me as how it used to be. Because daddy’s gone and no one else cared in that way.


Mom’s 61st birthday

We celebrated mom’s 61st birthday last weekend, had buffet hi tea at fuzion restaurant, Sunway Resort Hotel, and it was a nice afternoon of feasting and chatting <;;;3 <;;;3

My mom and her birthday present from Aunty Flo & Daryl

Me! Wore my hi lo dress fr miss self ridge, and I was slightly more adventurous with my eye look, I used the iridescent purple from my Too Faced Enchanted Glamourland palette.

Love the purple and pink color on my dress. I’m also wearing my vita inspired bracelet that I bought in Pisa 🙂

Can’t say I don’t eat my veggies 😛

I loved the dessert, looking back at this pic I wish I had more of the fondue >;.<;

Mommy with her cake that my dear cousin Tammy brought. More cake!

Some pics from my Instagram

Everyone except my dear mr awesome

Very nice pool area near the restaurant

Aaah..wish I could be lounging by the pool right now..

Then at night we were invited for Jing & Wen’s birthday celebration in TGIF, Subang Parade. So there were 3 birthday ladies celebrating that night, including my mom 😀



We had the fujifilm instax camera to play with, lookit all the Polaroids ❤ ❤ I'm gonna get one of these soon!

One last pic…

Cheers! (the mango caramel mojito from TGIF is to die for *slurp*)

CNY day -2

Quick one with some pics I know you wanna see what I’ve been up to 😉

Pre reunion dinner at some restaurant in JB with dad’s side family.

Outfit.sorry I had to take the pic in the washroom 😀 all the cousins were wearing cocktail dresses and I was the only one with the cheongsam..err joining my aunts. Even mom was wearing some hot lace dress.i dunno what I was thinking..haha

Continued the party at Aunty hong’s house. This was the 4th bottle of sparkling white down..I think in the end we had 6 was yummy because it’s sweet. I loved sweet wine when I had plenty to choose from back in ukraine and I still love it ❤

And cherries!

Hot cousin XY with the cherry to illustrate the size, apparently bigger than her eyes..haha

More updates if I’m not lazy. Oh yeah and a shitload of pics from krabi too! Scandalous ones,from totally epic moments 😉

Happy CNY!

Ps : someone awesome is coming to visit me in jb 🙂


missing you so much dad ;(

Sleep is being elusive again. It’s probably hiding in between the heartache and the hurt.

Thru this ordeal

Been away because I’m struggling to find a way to live, let alone write. I’m still missing my dad so much, I guess that’s not gonna change.what I could hope for is to cope better with it.

It is at times of great adversities that the distinction between the true friends who really cares..and the ones who do it out of guilt become really blatant. I’m blessed to have many true friends to stand beside me and hold my hand through this horrible ordeal, so I don’t really need your guilt upon me..and you don’t need to pretend either. And yes, if you think I’m speaking right at you, well maybe I am.

I will always always love my dad. Someday I’ll be able to write beautiful things and speak of the wonderful memories with him. But right now I need to figure out a way to fix my life and my heart.

I will be back when I’m able to write again, soon.

The dress that got away


On a hunt for a dress for my beloved cousin’s wedding. the colors are supposed to be black and gold or black or gold.. This was one dress I tried but didn’t buy. I liked the toga shoulder detail of the dress so pretty with the pleats and flowers. Will post pic of the real event so you can see the final dress that I picked 😉

Of lemons and everything else for now

I’ve been lazy (if it was even possible for me to be lazierrrrr ) but I’m so impressed by the impeccable customer service from that i can’t not blog about it. After waiting for almost a month and my order hasn’t arrived so i emailed customer service to inform and after a few mails back and forth finally i received one from them that says they’ve sent out a SECOND shipment of the stuff i ordered, since i did not receive the first. and even refunded me for one of the item which is out of stock. Oh i am so impressed..i don’t even get service like this when i stop in the stores.. over here. And of course.. as how things have to happen.. I RECEIVED my parcel yesterday. Just after receiving the email notifying that they’ve sent out the second parcel -__-  So i’ll be returning it to them when i receive it.. in a month’s time? Anyway my kimono jacket is here and i’m happy and satisfied but the sizing runs a bit big. I’m returning a pair of pretty lace shorts because..believe it or not it’s too big on me.

here’s some quick updates. Daddy is..okay, still in the hospital, still requiring TPN and we are waiting for him to recuperate from the previous surgery before going in for the next surgery. Just hoping that in the meanwhile he remains stable with no further complications.

And I have a little good news that i’m not gonna write too much about lest i jinx it >.<  time for me to do some homework.. speaking of which I’ve been on leave for so long i’m feeling rather disorientated and half looking forward to starting work again. Might be starting *soon*

It’s not easy having everything that I have turned in the opposite direction; with dad being unwell for so long, and all we can do is be patient. And every other thing that happened at the most inopportune time. To this point of my life I’ve not felt this much that I need to seek my faith , and I am slowly..trying to discover where i belong. Maybe God will seek me instead? and hopefully show me the way. In the meantime i’ll just be good. haha. Try to be good 😉

When life gives you lemons and for some reason you can’t make lemonade, find a recipe for a lemon cake. The secret is to turn bitter into sweet and darkness into light.

New car!

Having a quick breakfast with cousin Daryl and his friend Eric. Today we have ab agenda… We are collecting daddy’s new car from cycle & carriage 😉 daddy is still warded at sunway medical centre, so we are collecting on his behalf. Feeling kinda excited now 😀

love and its possibilities

too many things happening all at once and i’m overwhelmed. daddy’s not well at the moment *keeping fingers crossed* he will feel better soon.

right smack in the middle of the night and im sleepless trying to conjure a way to get an ipad2 tomorrow without joining the queue now. crazy ah?

Balik kampung!

We are currently on the way back to johor ,that’s our hometown and the extended families are there including grandma for the next few days I’ll be a small town girl, in rengam. My friends always joked bout that.haha it’s hilarious one day I should pack them along with me 😉

Liev taking a pee break